I’ve been thinking a lot lately about going for big dreams and achieving them. While I do believe we can set goals and achieve them and envision big dreams and navigate toward them, how they materialize isn’t always what we expect.
In fact, the bigger the dream, the bigger the price you’re probably going to have to pay.
For example in August 2011 on the way home from a family beach vacation, I caught the vision of a loving, connected marriage. I envisioned being with a lively, energetic person who would travel with me and share a true connection with me. I wasn’t sure how that was going to happen because I was not in that type of relationship at the time. The plan I laid out to achieve that looked something like this:
- Get in shape, get healthy. In other words, make myself energetically capable of achieving the dream.
- Work on my existing marriage to see if I can bring it around.
- Hope that somehow my spouse would start taking care of himself and get passionate about life.
- Keep making the great money I made at the time and travel and see the world.
Big Dreams Rarely Materialize As Planned
When I envisioned my big dreams, I never would have chosen the route I ended up traveling. I do believe it was important for me to have a plan and step out onto the path. Getting in shape and getting healthy gave me the strength for the more rigorous path that I ended up traveling. Also, having a compelling vision kept me going when I otherwise would have thrown in the towel.
Here’s how the road to my big dreams really looked…
- Lose your business overnight.
- Scramble to re-invent yourself FAST.
- Get divorced after 28 years.
- Make some stupid dating mistakes.
- Get your heart stomped on after giving a relationship all you had.
- Learn how to set boundaries with men and truly value yourself.
- Give up on the whole idea of getting married and just be okay with yourself.
- Find the love of your life (the son of one of your good friends) right under your nose. In fact, you’ll pass him every day as he directs traffic outside your son’s middle school.
- Figure out how to open up your heart again and release the fear to let him in.
- Get married after a brief engagement.
- Suffer a health challenge that negatively impacts your business.
- Lose confidence in yourself mentally, spiritually and financially.
- Lose your home and property you bought with your grandfather’s inheritance.
- Start over in a smaller “new for us together” house.
- Take your business in a different direction – a direction you’ve been resisting.
- Find some great clients to work with who send you lots of word-of-mouth referrals so you can get back on your feet again.
- Find more peace and harmony in your home than you’ve ever had in your life.
- Love the man you married more each and every day.
- Take that beach vacation together that you envisioned 5 years earlier.
Not in a million years would I have crafted a plan including that much disappointment, heartache, or loss.
Was it worth it? Yes, absolutely!
Lessons Learned from Going for Big Dreams
- The path we keep resisting is often the path we’re supposed to travel.
- Nothing comes without a price. Within everything bad is an equal and opposite good. And sometimes the road to heaven takes a detour through hell.
- Through it all, God is with you. You may have times when you can’t hear His voice and you think He’s abandoned you, but He is found in the tiny little tender mercies – the friend who comes to your aid in your darkest moment, or the scrap gold you find in an old jewelry box that you can sell to pay a bill.
- It’s all about learning to TRUST. You come to the end and KNOW — absolutely KNOW it wasn’t you that created the happy ending, because there’s no way on earth you would have created such a crazy path to get there.
- Only God is creative enough to give you your dream with the added bonus of all the character traits, life lessons and valuable experiences to shape you into the person worthy of the dream.
So craft that vision that makes your heart sing and propels you forward at all costs. Formulate your plan to get started. Take action. Let go. Let go. Let go. And hang on for the ride, knowing in the end it will all be worth it.